Published: April 30, 2008 02:08 pm         

I’m not an economist, but I played one once

I’m so glad we’re not in a recession. For a minute or two there, I was really worried.

I know we’re not, you see, because that’s what our president said last week.

“We are not in a recession. We are in a slowdown.”

His words, not mine.

Good. Glad we cleared that up.

I’m reminded of an old episode of “All in the Family” when it comes to such talk about the economy. Perhaps you remember it as well.

Archie Bunker is talking with Edith, explaining things to her as he always did, oft times with just a hint of disdain for having to explain things to begin with.

“Arrrrrrrrchie,” she says, “what is a recession?”

“Well, Edith,” he dutifully explains, “a recession is when the dollar is worth less and less.”

“Oh, OK,” she says, then a moment later adds, “then what is a depression?”

Looking up over his half-rim glasses and folding his newspaper in his lap, he sighs heavily and looks her way.

“Well, Edith, that’s when people are depressed because their dollar is worth less and less.”

I’m guessing our president watched that same episode of “All in the Family.”

I wrote a week or so ago about my first $50 tank of gasoline.

Yes, that was depressing. My dollar bought less gasoline than it used to. Fits the “Archie-nomics” analysis to a “T” in this case.

But it’s not just gas, and you and I know that.

I wonder if our president really knows it. I doubt he is charged with grocery shopping for the White House kitchen, filling up the presidential limousine after searching for the cheapest gas in town, or having to write a stack of checks on payday for the lights, gas, water, phone, TV, Internet and the like. I really don’t think he’ll be able to understand the plight of the American people until he has to do those things.

And, I wonder how down to earth any of the presidential candidates are in that regard. It’s something to think about, you know ...

I once worked for someone who proudly proclaimed the fact he had never eaten a Big Mac.

In talking with him one day about salaries of workers I was charged with overseeing, and how we could help them do better for themselves, some of the same topics I just pondered about our presidential possibles came up.

“Do you have any idea how much a gallon of milk costs?” I asked.

“No,” was the reply.

“Do you have any idea how much a jar of mayonnaise costs?” I inquired.

“No, I don’t,” was the reply.

“Well, your employees do, and they cost a lot more than they used to,” I offered in explanation.

No, the argument didn’t work. Didn’t much think it would, but I had to try.

The reality here is whether our president’s assessment of our current economic state is fact, fiction, or fairy tale, the American people — that would be you, me and all our neighbors — are in a much better position to advise the president on life in the trenches than a bunch of men and women in $1,000 suits who may or may not have gotten at least a “B” in economics and know how to read a spreadsheet.

The president needs to be talking to homemakers, hard-working families and senior citizens to find out just how tough things are in the real world and then do something to help them, rather than try to console them with uplifting words and tax stimulus checks that will come back to haunt all of us next year.

That’s my one-cent worth.

I’d give two cents, but hey, gas is up to $3.50 a gallon now, coffee’s going up, milk is pushing $4, mayonnaise is close to $3 ...

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Bob Belcher writes for Corsicana (Texas) Daily Sun. He may be reached by e-mail at belcher@corsicanadailysun.com.